The holidays are a wonderful time to spend with friends and family, but they can also be stressful. If you’re feeling overwhelmed and your emotions are getting the best of you, look to wisdom from Stoic philosophers!
Below are some of my favorite quotes from The Stoicism Book of Quotes to help you feel more balanced and get back to enjoying time with your loved ones.
“You have power over your mind—not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.” —Marcus Aurelius
Inner strength comes from your ability to manage, regulate, and control your emotions and thoughts. Realizing you have the power to chose your reactions and responses leaves you feeling more in control of yourself and of your life. You can’t control family members, friends, situations, or circumstances, but your thoughts are always within your control. Focus on what within your control, not what isn’t.
“Don’t hope that events will turn out the way you want, welcome events in whichever way they happen: this is the path to peace.” —Epictetus
Acceptance is the key to balance, well-being, and a peaceful existence. Focus on what is actually happening instead of future thinking, which is filled with jumping to conclusions and “what if” scenarios. If you catch yourself in this thought process, bring your attention back to the present. Letting go of situations out of your control allows for more energy to be directed to the current situation. Everyone wants the perfect holiday, but at what expense? Let things unfold as they may and enjoy being in the moment and accepting things as they come.
“Enjoy present pleasures in such a way as not to injure future ones.” —Seneca
View each day as an opportunity to see the beauty and good even in the little things. This is especially true during the busy holiday months. Don’t get swept up in the hustle and bustle of the season. Remain centered and focused on the positives in each day. Bring your attention to the quiet moments of each day that bring forth peace and serenity. When you view each day with gratitude, your mindset shifts, and you will have a greater level of appreciation.
“The tranquility that comes when you stop caring what they say. Or think or do. Only what you do.” —Marcus Aurelius
Surround yourself with positive people who enhance your overall well-being, focus your energy on supportive people who accept you for who you are and who make you feel good about yourself. Don’t waste your energy on people who bring you down with negativity and judgment. This quote maybe a little more difficult to follow, especially around the holidays, since you might feel like you have an obligation to see certain relatives. If this is the case, and there is no way out of it, at least try to limit your time with them and focus on the positives, even if there aren’t many. Remind yourself that you are not in control of others, their opinions, or their actions. You are only in control of yourself, and that is what matters most.
“Not what we have but what we enjoy constitutes our abundance.” —Epicurus
The holidays are a time of comfort and joy. A time to be jolly and merry. A time to feel the magic and wonder of the season. Allow yourself to feel joyous and comforting emotions. Let go of past worry and uncertainty. You create your own happiness and are in control of your emotional well-being. Be proactive and take the necessary steps to make this a holiday to remember. Let the Stoics guide you in your new adventure of thriving during the holidays, not simply surviving.
Kortney Yasenka, LCMHC, is a licensed clinical mental health counselor who provides individual, family, and group therapy, as well as life coaching services. She is certified in trauma focused cognitive behavioral therapy and has experience working with veterans and active military personnel. She has a Masters in Counseling Psychology with a concentration in Health Psychology from Northeastern University. With over 15 years of experience, Kortney has worked in community mental health, school systems, and private practice while specializing in mood disorders, school and work related issues, life transitions, and self-esteem. Kortney is the co-author of The Stoicism Book of Quotes and wrote the foreword to The Resilient Warrior.
